I Will Never Treat My Kids Like That.

Today I spent the day watching How I Met Your Mother and reading almost due library books. But what really hit me was Athena when she returned today from the lake house. Mike and Carrie dropped off the food to go into the fridge before picking up Audrey and I saw Athena, her face red and tear-streaked. Later, after sending Audrey to bed I had Athena cuddle and talk to me. She started sobbing saying that her dad had told her mom that he didnt love Athena and didnt want to come see her. Carrie had set up the phone so that it was a three way specifically so that Athena could hear his reaction when Carrie asked why he hadn't seen her lately. I thought that this was too cruel for words. What kind of mom, knowing exactly what Athena's dad would say, would set her kid up for that pain? I rocked Athena and brushed away her tears, but my heart was just breaking. I kissed her on the top of her head and told her how wonderful she was, and how so many people love her. She said that her mom had said that Athena wasnt doing well in school so she thought that she wasnt mentally all there. I told Athena that just because a person isnt book smart doesnt mean that they have a disability. I explained to her that she has many friends and she is a wonderful person that will go far in life because of her sweet nature. I told her that she can do whatever she wants, and as long as she is happy she is blessed. I cuddled with her and encouraged her for about an hour before having to tuck her into bed. I sang her the song that my mom used to sing to me (oh god, I'm getting so emotional right now... I just cant do this anymore. She deserves so much better...I miss my parents. Thank you so much for loving me and showing me that) as I gave her a hug, and I heard her get choked up. I dont think her mom ever sang her to sleep. And she certainly would never tuck her into bed. Heck, I still love it when my mom comes and tucks me in! Does that make me a baby? I dont care, I love it! But I dont know what to do... I told her that I will always be there for her, and I mean it. If she ever needs me, some way I will make sure that she is safe. I just want her to be happy. She has already had to deal with so much in life yet she is just an amazing kid...
I have to sleep. If I can.

I'm Huge In China

The past few days have been uneventful. Yesterday Athena and I were watching Tyra and the show was about people who had addictions. One of the guys was addicted to porn. I certainly wasnt going to explain to Athena what porn was, and the show didnt go into details, just said that the guy loved watching videos of porn and loved looking at photos. I thought it had slid past her until after the show Thene looked at me and asked "Why would someone be addicted to corn?" Thank you, innocent minds!
Today I wasnt feeling well so Athena brought me some vanilla yogurt and let me sleep in. What a sweetheart. She also poured me a bowl of my own cereal (probably shouldnt leave the box out...). The girl is adorable and so thoughtful... it's so sad that her parents never show any physical love. She always cuddles up next to me and I shower her with hugs and kisses to the forehead. But her parents always shy away and push her to the side whenever she comes for consolation. I just dont know how a girl treated like that could be so loving.
Didnt get to see The Dark Knight yet. I wanted to go to the Imax and see it but it turns out that it has been sold out for over a month and the next open spot is two weeks from now. Well dang. I guess I'm going to have to go see it with all the other poor fans. I've heard simply amazing things about it, though. Even that it was better than sex. So I really hope to not be disappointed.
I watched Penelope on my laptop today and it inspired me to buy more soundtrack music. I purchased The Fall of Palladio by Kerry Muzzey, A Nice Ride from Seabiscuit, Hero from Kung Fu Panda, Smart Exit from Get Smart, a few songs from Penelope, even some songs from The Sims 2! But my favorite/worst purchase was Casper's Lullaby by James Horner. I absolutely HATE Casper because it makes me so sad. I rarely cry, but this movie makes me sob. So listening to the main song that has so many memories attached to it is pretty harsh to listen to. Unfortunately my stupid brain keeps listening to it on repeat. I'm a glutton for punishment. Here is a link to the song if you dont know it: http://youtube.com/watch?v=_8LZLn3BHBM
Because I didnt go to TDK I gave Jon a call today. He was at the Vans Warped Tour.... lucky. Anyway, I'm going with him sometime tomorrow. Better than going alone!
Have a great day!

I Survived a Japanese Gameshow

The cat.... he clawed me.... and ruined my shirt! One of my favorite shirts!!! So now I'll have to make a pillow out of it or something.... but I became sad. But at least today I had most of the day "off". Athena went to a friend's house and I chatted with Steph and Laura (my roomies next year) and got some reading in. It was nice.
My shirt.....

I Am The Mole

I hurt.... I hurt worse today. Aching muscles... I had trouble getting in and out of the car! How ridiculous is that...Took Athena and her friend Halley to Olive Garden, the mall and the movies. Olive Garden was delicious as always. The girls thought that it was SOOOOOOOOOOo fancy. Haha. Oh how little they have been exposed to. (wait, I think Olive Garden is fancy too.... dang.) We walked around the mall for a while until the movies started. They saw Journey to the Center of the Earth 3-D and I saw Hellboy II. It wasnt bad... the visuals were really nice. But the storyline was crap and the characters were not developed. I wouldnt pay full price to see it, but I do think it should be seen on the big screen.
Also, today was Monday. ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY CAME IN THE MAIL!!!! Honestly, it is the only thing that makes Mondays good. And on the cover this week.... TWILIGHT! That dang series that has ruined my expectations of males forever. Dang you, Stephenie Meyer!!! Hah. So yeah, I'll frame it or something.
Have a great night!!!

My Road Rage Does Not Define Me

Interesting weekend as always. Saturday was the lake picnic where I was commissioned to paint children's faces. With tempra paint. And dollar store paint brushes. I did what I could... after filling up on some of the most delicious rhubarb crumble I have ever had the lake goers took their pontoon boats and connected them all in the middle of the lake. For 6 hours. No bathroom. Or entertainment. Or food. Just me... watching 22+ kids.... floating in the water.... with at least 6 that have boundary problems... oh dear goodness. The parents chatted and sipped wine while I was yelling "Maxwell! You stay by the raft!...No, NOW!... Athena, dont push Gabby off the floaters... Drew, leave her aLONE!" My throat became raw and I'm pretty sure all the parents thought I was a nazi commander. Whatever. At least one of the parents thanked me when it was all done. Kudos to me. Oh, and I finally saw the elusive Kushman boys. The girls took like 20 pics of them with my camera without me knowing. I looked at my memory card and got very confused... haha. They are these brothers about my age (21 and 22) that are the Adonises of the lake. The girls cant stop raving about them and how I MUST meet them! Even Mike kept trying to put me in their path. Fortunately Carrie told me about their bad reputation and I personally dont want anything to do with them. But I guess every year they take the nanny out for a spin around the lake. I actually had a dream last night that when they came to take me for a boat ride I refused and they stabbed me with a knife. Violent dream.... so they were at the lake thing as well. I wasnt all that impressed. Too much talk keeps people from living up to expectations. Oh well. Afterward we brought a bunch of the kids ashore and we played hide-and-go seek tag. Sam and I hid in the jeep and locked the doors. The kids started coming up in droves and banged to be let in, screaming their heads off. It was like that scene in I Am Legend where the zombies attack Will Smith's jeep.... I think I had the same reaction he did....

Today... wow. I knew Carrie was overly cautious, but I didnt know she was a hypochondriac! She made me drive her into the emergency room because she had a cold sore. Granted, we didnt know it WAS a cold sore... the entire way she was sobbing and saying "It must be a sign. If it is a cold sore I am calling off the wedding. I'll have to quit my job... oh my god..." I was like, Whoa lady, quit your job? Because you've never had a cold sore before and god forbid you get one? I've never seen anyone freak out so badly. We got to the hospital and Carrie explains her "condition" to the lady at the counter. The lady, like me, cannot even see said cold sore. She still admits Carrie and we wait only to be told that yes, it isnt impetigo (or whatever Carrie was hoping it would be), it is a cold sore. Carrie broke down and the poor guy just looks at me and asks if she is okay. We go and pick out her prescription... the entire time she complains and acts like her life is over. She proceeds to spend over $50 on makeup to cover it up. And she wont give me $6 to bring her daughter to the movies... good lord, lady. We get back and Mike takes me, Athena and Sam tubing. I havent gone tubing in forever. Last time was at my friend Callie's. This time had the same results.... pain. bruises. lost articles of clothing. found articles of clothing. screaming. But it was SO MUCH FUN! I think Mike thought I was crazy because I kept screaming for the speed boat to go faster. And who fell off the most? Moi. But I was on the right side of the ... I dont know what to call it. It was like a big floaty thing, but it had like seats... you could just sit down and hold on to the sides... but there wasn't much support on the sides. So I guess you are supposed to go counterclockwise around the lake, and that makes the floaty tip to... THE RIGHT! Aw man... there were so many times I was so close.... Mike had never flipped the floaty before... we did this time! Killed his clean record! But it was SO MUCH FUN!!!! And did I mention it was fun? So we go around until I have fallen off to the point of not being able to float and then we go back in. To grab a different floaty. This one you have to lie on your stomach and hold on to handles on the front. Well, I was a little tall for that. So the entire time we're going around my knees are slapping the water dragging me even further into the water. I am so bruised up people are going to start thinking that Mike is beating me. Haha. Between the dog from last week (you can still see the wicked bruises from that one) and the bruises on my legs from tubing, I'm more black and blue than pasty white!
Tomorrow I am taking Athena and one of her friends out for a Girl's Day. We're getting all dressed up (I am doing hair and makeup. Oh joy) and going to Olive Garden for lunch, the mall for shopping and then Journey to the Center of the Earth (well, they are. I'm seeing Hellboy II). Should be fun. Wish me luck!!!!

xoxo

I Create Words That People Then Use On A Daily Basis

120 Miles
18 Doctor Who Episodes
3 Ears of Corn
2 Hours of Sleep

.....that pretty much sums up Thursday - Sunday

I knocked Athena out with my chest today. We were joking around and she did the whole Up In My Face thing... .and I meant to chest bump her... but I guess she is shorter than I thought... by quite a bit really. My rack knocked her to the ground. She couldnt stop laughing. Which is good. But not really... so now Athena keeps mocking me and saying that my boobs have fists of fury. Yeah. Right.

I Can Make Uggs Look Good.... I Just Choose Not To

Nothing to report. Rain. Lots and lots of rain. Though I expect many of you are experiencing the same bipolar weather.
Played a bunch of board games and ate flan with Athena. We played a trivia game and she wouldnt give me credit on one answer when I said Mussolini. Turns out I needed his first name as well. Who knows Mussolini's first name? Honestly!
Rain....rain.... go away..... come again after I can find a way to subscribe to PayPerView....

I Eat Watermelon During Pie Eating Contests

Nothing exciting happened today. I guess that is a good and bad thing. Watched Anastasia (one of my FAVORITE movies of all time! I'm just a kid when it comes to movies) with Athena and we sang out hearts out. She loves it when I sing along with Disney movies... she thinks I should be on American Idol. Haha. Cute kid... she also thinks I make an amazing omelet. So obviously she is biased. Took Athena and her friend Taylor to the pool today. Sat there for a while thinking that if they were really my kids, would I be more interested in watching them play in the pool? How do parents do it? Going to swim meets, football games, concerts.... I would be so bored! They say it is different when it is your own, but are they just trying to cover it up? I would want to be supportive, but do you think I could sneak in a Nintendo DS or something and none of the other parents would notice as I try to get the high score during my kid's solo?

I Am The Chosen One

God never intended for me to drive a truck. Especially Mike's truck. It's a beast. Not one of those He Must Be Trying To Compensate For Something trucks. This truck is meant to kill everything in its path. And I had to maneuver it today. I am a Cute Car gal. It is hard enough for me to park your average two seater, much less a normal car. The smaller and lower to the ground the better. I shake just looking at some of those beasts. So yeah.... no trucks for Jakki!
I had an appointment today at two but my car was boxed in. I had Athena call Carrie to see if her car keys were in the house. Carrie had them in her purse (some good it would do me!) and proceeded to give Athena the third degree. Where were we going? Why? What time? Who would be with us? I told her we were going to Hermantown at two for an appointment. She called back about 20 mins later screaming at Athena and calling us liars because Hermantown is in Minnesota (right next to Duluth). Where were we REALLY going? The mall? Bowling? Because we were lying. Turns out my mind switched Hermantown and Hudsonville around and now I was once again this huge liar out to screw Carrie and her family over. I finally decided that this was it. They constantly thought I had lied with no reason to think so. I hadn't lied to them ever before. I had a chat with them after dinner (and before tennis!). Carrie explained that they had been lied to by the other nanny so much that they are now a bit paranoid. She also said that she and Mike thought of me as one of their kids (ooooookay?) and they dont really trust their kids either.... They stated that they were too overprotective and would learn to trust me with time. Not really what I wanted, but I guess I have to go with it. I had told Athena earlier that I might be leaving and she promptly burst into tears. She said that I could live in her room and I could work at the zoo (where did the zoo come from?) and stay with them. It was so endearing. But when I thought about it more, I was really liking the idea of going back home. I really miss my family and while the experience is great, I am strapped for cash. I need to get some income somewhere if I want to do anything at all next year. And it is supposed to be a great movie year next semester. PUMPED!!! WHOOT! So yeah, I guess I just have to go with it right now... But I wasn't sad at the idea of going home.

Jakkicus the Great

I can hurl tennis rackets at small moving objects with startling accuracy.

What is up with Michigan? Have I finally turned pretty or have the guys here just had the same old stuff for too long? Like yesterday... went back to the A&W (not sure if I told this story already...). Talked to the guys at the counter. Ended up getting the number of one of the guys and I got invited to a concert this Friday by a girl named Kate who thought I was pretty cool... Never heard of the band before though. Mindless Self-Indulgence? I dunno, I dont think I will go, but maybe I'll give her a call and invite her to Get Smart. Why not? Also got complimented by the guys at the movies... Took Athena to see The Happening yesterday. I snuck an eleven year old into a rated R movie. WHAT was I thinking? She really wanted to see it so I saw no real problem with it. The reviews said it wasnt scary (they also said it wasnt good) so I thought it would be okay. She freaked out at the previews. Poor Athena had to sit in my lap during the entire movie and would often whimper into my shoulder. Guys, I applaud you if you dont complain when your girl sits on your lap the entire movie. About fifteen minutes in I couldnt feel my legs, much less pay attention to the movie. I found it hilarious, btw. Also went to the movies today. Got to see an advanced screening of The Love Guru. Took Athena to that. I didnt want to go, but it was free and better than sitting around in the house. Plus my dream would be to become a movie reviewer (right after princess or superhero), so that would mean going to movies I didnt want to watch. I had really low expectations (I would much rather Get Smart do well in the box office this weekend as I aDORE Steve Carrell) and it turned out to be quite funny! Offensive and vulgar, but kept the laughs going. For example, here are some quotes I remember:
"Do you want some Quebec Pizza?"
"Whats that?"
"Pop tart and ketchup."

"Dont look at me with that tone of voice or I swear to God I will punch you in your shirt!"

"You're jumpy.... like prison bitch jumpy...

They had a bunch of great one liners. Almost all of them went over Athena's head, thank god. But anyway, her mom insisted we get there an hour early as the seats were first come first serve. Turns out we didnt need to go nearly that early at all, but oh well. So we're standing in line and I'm bored and listening in on other people's conversations. The four guys behind us are just chit chatting and the old lady in front was talking about bodily issues. Oooookay. So we get in and sit down and the four guys in line behind us end up sitting in front of me and Athena. I've got nothing better to do so I try to start up a meaningful conversation with Athena. Do you know how hard it is to talk politics with a kid? Not informed at all. Haha. So there are maybe like 20 people in the theatre at this point with about 50 mins left before the picture. Three of the four guys get up for some odd reason and leave for a bit. I get bored and say to Athena "You know what we should do? Make friends." Immediately the guy in front of me turns around and says "I'll be your friend!" We talk for a good while before his friends come back and then continue the conversation with all. Brad and Andrew (Andrew was the guy I talked to first) talked to me about what to do in Grand Rapids and Married and Married (how they introduced themselves.... not sure how to take that) talked to me about movies. Married number one kept commenting on how I was perfect for this Andrew guy because I love to play poker. Low standards, huh? Haha. He also makes the comment about how he noticed me come in and told the guys to sit by me and Athena. Why do I always make friends with the creepers? But they were a fun bunch to talk to and I didnt give any real info out. Turns out Married No. 1 was born in Minnesota! We talked Ya Sure Ya Betcha for a while to bug his friends. Nice guys. A good distraction for 40+ minutes.

Have a great night!

The World Doesnt Have Walls

Athena decided that the next time we are up at the lake house we should do a ding dong ditch. I told her I'm not much of a runner, so I'll ditch her and she can ring the doorbell and get caught. She seemed up for the idea.
Tomorrow is Athena's last day of school and she gets back at 12.50, so I'll have to wake up before then. Oh darn. We spent most of the day playing games and deciding what movies to watch. We both love Disney movies (I'm a huge sucker for a prince) so she decided to make a list of movies that I have to buy on DVD. Her list consists of:
Anastasia (Not really Disney, but one of my favorites)
Hercules
The Little Mermaid
Aladdin
Beauty and the Beast
Bambi (I'm not gettin this one. I HATE this movie SO much!!!)
So yeah, we'll see how that goes.

Went rollerblading before bed. I love rollerblading, even if it is with two 11 year olds (we picked up Taylor at her house). I'm actually really good at it. My childhood dream was to live at Skate City and just skate backward for hours. Just like with skiing, I always want to be the fastest. But I discovered an important difference between skating outside and skating in Skate City - the world doesnt have walls... and I dont know how to stop. Many, many hills in Hudsonville. We skated to the park where we proceeded to twirl on a tire swing until we both were ready to throw up. Good times. There were three guys playing softball at the field next to the park, and Taylor and Athena kept pushing me to go and talk to them. The opening line would be "Hey boys, who is winning?" Haha. They're so cute... their goal for the summer is to find me the perfect guy. Thanks girls... Just to humor them I went over and talked to the guys. Just chatted. I went back and the girls were glowing. Athena was gushing over how the guy without a shirt was "checking me out". I'm not sure she even knows what that means. Today I taught her "copping a feel" when she described to me what this one kid was trying to do in her class. I think we are equally bad influences on each other. ; )

Have a great day!!!