I Am The Chosen One

God never intended for me to drive a truck. Especially Mike's truck. It's a beast. Not one of those He Must Be Trying To Compensate For Something trucks. This truck is meant to kill everything in its path. And I had to maneuver it today. I am a Cute Car gal. It is hard enough for me to park your average two seater, much less a normal car. The smaller and lower to the ground the better. I shake just looking at some of those beasts. So yeah.... no trucks for Jakki!
I had an appointment today at two but my car was boxed in. I had Athena call Carrie to see if her car keys were in the house. Carrie had them in her purse (some good it would do me!) and proceeded to give Athena the third degree. Where were we going? Why? What time? Who would be with us? I told her we were going to Hermantown at two for an appointment. She called back about 20 mins later screaming at Athena and calling us liars because Hermantown is in Minnesota (right next to Duluth). Where were we REALLY going? The mall? Bowling? Because we were lying. Turns out my mind switched Hermantown and Hudsonville around and now I was once again this huge liar out to screw Carrie and her family over. I finally decided that this was it. They constantly thought I had lied with no reason to think so. I hadn't lied to them ever before. I had a chat with them after dinner (and before tennis!). Carrie explained that they had been lied to by the other nanny so much that they are now a bit paranoid. She also said that she and Mike thought of me as one of their kids (ooooookay?) and they dont really trust their kids either.... They stated that they were too overprotective and would learn to trust me with time. Not really what I wanted, but I guess I have to go with it. I had told Athena earlier that I might be leaving and she promptly burst into tears. She said that I could live in her room and I could work at the zoo (where did the zoo come from?) and stay with them. It was so endearing. But when I thought about it more, I was really liking the idea of going back home. I really miss my family and while the experience is great, I am strapped for cash. I need to get some income somewhere if I want to do anything at all next year. And it is supposed to be a great movie year next semester. PUMPED!!! WHOOT! So yeah, I guess I just have to go with it right now... But I wasn't sad at the idea of going home.

Jakkicus the Great

I Have Amazing Depth Perception

And now the Weekend Update brought to you by Pillsbury Croissants!
Four days out of the month. Four days I dread more than the dentist, tests, and mushrooms on pizza. Four days... I have to swim in the lake with the kids.
I abhor swimming in the lake. I have never been a great (nor good) swimmer and dont enjoy being in the water. I love a great shower, but that is as far as my water love goes. I even have to wear gloves when doing the dishes so my fingers dont get all raisin-y. So whenever we go up to the lake house, I try to think up excuses not to go in the water. It doesnt help that the girls are practically mermaids. It wouldnt be so bad if I didnt fear fish biting me and my legs getting caught in weeds. I know that those are irrational worries, but just the idea in my head of a fish coming near me makes my pulse race and my Fight or Flight reflex activate. And we all know I wouldnt win in a fight. Plus I hate how I look in a bathing suit, so I'm extremely hesitant to put one on and jump in. At least I have one of those floaty noodles (lovingly coined Samuelson) so I dont drown in a panic when one of the girls comments on the fish she saw swim by.
I spent my "downtime" reading. The one book I had brought with was horrible for me. Maybe you will understand why... here is an excerpt:
' "I dont know. I just - just feel you - bristle when - when someone gets - attention. Why?"
"I - I dont think I - bristle," retorted Glenna.
"Yes - you do. I've felt it - often."'
end excerpt.
Dear God! The hyphens!!! And the book was just filled with them! The characters must have all had speech disorders to be stuttering every freaking second! And my poor head... Every time I saw a hyphen, I paused in my head. That's what you are supposed to do. I think the book took about two hours longer than it should have with pauses alone! Granted, it was a good book. I could relate quite a bit to the main character. She always felt in competition with everyone. Also she had a distorted image of herself. While I do not think I have a misinterpretation of myself in my head, I must say that others think otherwise. I do not think of myself as a person worthy of attention, yet (back home especially) many of my guy friends would like to become more than such. And to be completely honest, I am not sure why. Since they have no interest in me before becoming friends, it surely has to be my personality. Goodness knows it cannot be my looks. Compared to my peers I look like a busty twelve-year-old. Not sure what about my personality would be attractive. But I am an acquired taste. I am sarcastic, to the point, overly playful, somewhat lazy, not extremely talented at anything, highly competitive and sharp tongued. Not many people consider those qualities highly sought after. Haha. And it is funny because there are so many things that I would not put up with in a relationship. Yet I myself am certainly nowhere near perfect. That is one thing that I have learned while here..... things that I would not put up with. Mike and Carrie... how they treat each other. It disgusts me. It would seem to an outsider like they were preparing for a divorce, not marriage. They constantly yell and undermine each other. The way they react to things... it isnt with love or even affection. It is one thing to have different parenting methods. It is another to take everything out on everyone else. I wouldnt be able to handle it. A quick example:
This Friday while Mike was driving the family to the lake house we got into an accident. Firstly you need to know that Sam and I did not have seat belts on and Mike's driving scares me, so I was on edge already. It is hard enough to fit four people (one with hips) in the back seats but nearly impossible when one has to have a booster seat (legally required starting July 1st) . So Sam and I were seatbeltless. We were on the highway and there are cars all around us as it is rush hour. All of a sudden in front of us there is a bumper in the middle of the road. Mike cant swerve because he would hit another car, so he is forced to hit it. It gets stuck underneath the car and we're scraping by still at 80mph. Mike tries to pull over, but the entire time he and Carrie are yelling at each other over whose fault it is. Mike says he cannot pull over far enough, but cannot keep driving otherwise the car will start on fire. The girls, hearing this, burst into tears. Sam literally jumps into my lap and sobs. Carrie yells at Mike for scaring the kids and the arguing continues. All this time nothing is helping the situation. If it were me, the first thing I would do is ask if everyone was alright. Never once was the question posed to the girls. They were so shaken and I'm sure that seeing their mother calm would have helped a lot. I certainly would not have yelled at my husband. It was an accident that nobody was at fault for. Trying to blame him... I would be the one making a joke about it making sure that everyone was safe and sound. It was handled horribly. So yeah, that is something that I would never put up with. They also never show affection for one another. Not even a loving glance. I would need someone that would put his arms around my waist while I am cooking something and tell me how great it smells (even if it reeks, and then I would tease him about it). Mike and Carrie both just come home, eat dinner, watch television, scold the kids and go to bed. I couldnt live my life like that. I would smother my kids with kisses as soon as I got in the door, ask my husband how his day went, turn on music after dinner and dance until my feet hurt. Give a back massage, play with the kids, and watch Wheel of Fortune (God bless you, Vanna White). Every night the kids would go to bed knowing they are loved, not a nuisance. I just dont understand how people can treat each other so. As always, I am reminded how extremely lucky I am to have parents that cared for me and each other.
I had to be sneaky this weekend. As I have stated before, these people dont eat. Especially during the weekends. Breakfast if one is lucky, and lunch OR dinner. So we really eat once a day at around 2pm or 8pm. Normally I bring my own food so that I do not starve but this week I forgot to get something. I had to improvise. Saturday night Sam and Athena slept over at a friend's house and Mike and Carrie went to a neighbor's to get drunk. I knew that the time had come... so I put Audrey to bed and snuck downstairs. I turned on the oven, took the croissant dough out of the fridge, and went to work. After the croissants had been baked, I covertly ran back into my room, all the while holding the pastries like I had captured the heir to the throne. And I ate them all in my attempt to cover my tracks. An entire container of croissant rolls... eaten in one night. Ugh. SO bad! .... but so good....
I am about to fall asleep. So I hope that if you are reading this, you have a superb night. And if you see the guy I'm supposed to fall for, please tell him to hurry up. I'm tired of being so lonely.

xoxo

I dont get lost... I accidentally find new places.

I am finding that good days dont consist of awesome things... they consist of things not going badly. And that's okay.
I am finding that I am more and more excited to go back to school. Never thought I would say that!
The girls think that when I sing I sound like Ariel from the Little Mermaid. Not sure if that is a good thing, but I'll take it.
Let the girls watch The Eye tonight. Had to tuck them all in, check the closets and under the beds. My bad. haha.

I breed prize winning clams.

I decided to crack down and be tough on the girls today. So when Athena and Audrey started fighting, I gave them one warning. The next time I sent them to their rooms until lunch. I gave them another chance. We went to the park and after about 20 minutes some guy with a camera came by. I thought nothing of it. A little bit later, Sam commented on how she thought that the guy was taking photos of us and that every time she looked over at him (he was pretty far away) he turned and looked away. I got the girls out of there ASAP. Didnt want to take any chances. We get back to the house and the girls have a water balloon fight. Athena and Audrey actually start fighting and I once again am forced to send them up to their rooms. Athena said that she hated this summer and it was going to be a horrible one. Ouch. I took that as a direct hit. I know I am supposed to be tough and all, but that hurt. Athena is my favorite and I never thought she would say something like that. Sam and I went out and hit each other with painful missiles of water wrapped in rubber and came back in to make some cocoa. I let the girls out of their rooms to get cocoa even though I had told them that they couldnt have any because of fighting. I am such a pushover. The rest of the day went smoothly. The season finale of Farmer Wants a Wife was tonight and the girls actually started counting down at 9am. They were just so excited. And I kinda was too. We really bonded over that show, silly as it was. Well, we didnt end up watching it together. Sam and Athena went with Mike and Carrie to do laundry over at Mike's mom's and Audrey and I watched it alone. But after the show, Sam ran into the house and screamed "BROOKE WONNNNNNN!" which I had also been surprised by considering she was a long shot toward the end. So the girl that the girls were rooting for was the victor. Awesome.
Divorce has never really affected me. About 95% of my friends parents are still married (though happily I couldnt say) and my own parents get along smashingly. But I saw the affects of divorce tonight with Sam. Mike and Carrie called her out on not going to cheerleading practice on Tuesday. Sam cried for two hours. I sat there with her, trying to calm her down. The entire time Mike and Carrie are verbally just wearing her down and using the 'when I was your age' as well as the 'you dont know how good you have it' and calling her a liar, quitter and annoyance. I just wanted to hold this poor girl in my arms, rock her and tell her that everything is going to be okay. After a lifetime she told Mike and Carrie that her mom had told her that practice had been cancelled. We all knew that Sam's mom doesnt want Sam to do cheerleading anymore because she doesnt want to drive her in to practice (Or so says Mike. I dont want to judge). So Sam tries telling Mike and Carrie how hard it is to have both parents saying the other is wrong and saying horrible things about the other. Last year I guess she was put in the middle when one parent accused the other of not paying their half for cheerleading. Dont know how all that went down, but it sounds like Sam had to deal with a lot of stuff and ended up being the messenger. She is thirteen. She shouldnt have to deal with that! I've known her to be a very strong kid, and she is very caring and loving, and it just killed me to see her break down like this. Carrie and Mike basically told her to suck it up, this stuff happens. After they sent her to bed at midnight, I walked her to her room, held her and told her that we would work it out. She just sobbed and nodded into my shoulder. She was just exhausted and practically passed out as soon as her head hit the pillow. I just couldnt believe the way that Mike was treating her. He was so cold and kept accusing her of stuff and it only made everything worse. I know he means well and he is a good guy, but he has no idea how to handle these situations. The entire time I kept thinking that I would never be able to marry a guy like that. Poor Sam.

Critics worldwide swoon over my original line of corduroy evening wear.

Oh my gosh oh my gosh oh my gosh... I want to go home. Is this how people feel when they are on death row? My stomach is so tight and I feel like I cannot breathe. I thought the day was bad, but then it got so much worse.
Today was a hard day because the kids kept fighting, but I thought that it was the end of it. I went to bed and was called out of my room by Mike. He said that he and Carrie needed to talk to me. I had no idea what it was about. He asked me if Sam had come over that weekend. I said that no, she had not. They had explicitly asked me to not have Sam over because her mom is apparently some psycho and will use it against him in court or something... so okay. I didnt have Sam over. They asked me again, if on Saturday had I had Sam over. I said I couldnt remember what I did on Saturday, but Sam did not come over. They said that the neighbors had called them to let them know that Sam came over on Saturday. I said that they must have been mistaken, though I had nobody over. They then played a message on the answering machine. It was from Sam's mom on Saturday asking when to pick Sam up. When I had heard the message originally on Saturday I assumed it was a wrong number but forgot to delete it. Wow. The evidence was stacked against me. I kept proclaiming my innocence, even showing them the entry on here from Saturday (thank god there was nothing negative against them in that one. Haha). I dont think either of them believe me, and I wouldnt believe me either. But now I am so confused... where did all this evidence come from since Sam DIDNT come over? I want to go home... this is so awkward...

I put toe socks on my hands.

Well the family is back. Both Carrie and Mike are sick with (supposed) food poisoning so I entertained the kids. On my day off. Again. Tomorrow we are all going biking. I figure I clocked in eight miles over the past two days. Not bad for someone who hasnt been on a bike in forever. I'm more of a rollerblades girl. But ever since that fall... I'm too scared to go downhill.
My friends and I have been talking about how nobody can get into a relationship over the summer because we know that stuff wont last. A couple made lists of their dream partner. It got me thinking. I mean, I've been attracted to a multitude of guys with various interests and looks... I've never been into a guy who is really into his body. And punctuality is key. I like being the first to things (I'm usually ten minutes early to class and feel like crap if I'm not) and if someone is late it is like a slap in the face to me. Humor is a big thing as well. I have a ... different sense of humor. The same as my dad. I guess what they say is true... you go for a guy like your dad. My Dad has a lot of great qualities, and I wouldnt mind finding someone with them. I dont think I could ever marry someone that my parents and brother didnt approve of. But my Dad's approval means a lot to me. So to illustrate, I'll use some pictures. If you find a guy with even a quarter of these qualities, PLEASE give me a call (Mom, if you say Aaron Brown, I swear I will never speak to you again. Haha.)
The ability to pull of glasses and amazing hair of David Tennant
The comedic timing and brains of Justin Bartha
The quirkyness of Russell Brand
Manners and integrity. Ability to make me laugh. Awesome chef would be a bonus. I love a well made cheesecake. Haha. I dont want the crazy rebel or the captain of the football team. A smart, funny guy that I can bring home to my parents is on the top of the list. I used to think that I wanted to be treated like a princess... I'd just like to be treated with respect. Thats the list!

Have a great night.

On weekends, to let off steam, I participate in full-contact origami.

There are no girls in this town. None. It's now a scientific fact. I researched it. The only people I now know are guys. Not that there is anything wrong with that... girls tend to be biatches anyway. Guys dont do drama as much. Nice change. So I have the three guys at the A&W, Tom at the nail place, and now this guy Eric at Blockbuster. Poor Eric... I kinda showed him up today. I know WAAAY too much about movies. And Eric knows it. So he actually had a customer come over and ask ME for recommendations for suspenseful movies. It was fun. She ended up going with Basic. A good classic choice, I believe. So yeah. Only guys. My life is turning into an episode of My Boys. At least it's not The L Word.
MapQuest sucks. I wanted KFC really badly today (I love honey mustard... it sounds so gross... just discovered it last year with my mum. Yummy!) so I mapquested it. Followed all the directions. Said it would take like 5 mins to get there. 15 mins later I am tempted to turn around, only I have no idea where I am and I'm on the highway. Finally get there. Freaked out on the way. But TOTALLY worth it! Haha. Had the guy surprise me. I got like chicken strips or something.
Been free since Thursday. Went to Get Smart. Liked it. Went to Blockbuster and picked up a multitude of dvds.... I have now seen Big Love Season 1, Carnivále Season 1, Rome Season 1, and Newsies again. Also biked 10 miles. Go me!
I feel like Dalek's are chasing me. Bonus points to whoever gets that reference!
Please, entertain me.

xoxo

I made pancakes and bought Jelly Bellies

Really, thats... thats all that happened today.

Yeah.

I can hurl tennis rackets at small moving objects with startling accuracy.

What is up with Michigan? Have I finally turned pretty or have the guys here just had the same old stuff for too long? Like yesterday... went back to the A&W (not sure if I told this story already...). Talked to the guys at the counter. Ended up getting the number of one of the guys and I got invited to a concert this Friday by a girl named Kate who thought I was pretty cool... Never heard of the band before though. Mindless Self-Indulgence? I dunno, I dont think I will go, but maybe I'll give her a call and invite her to Get Smart. Why not? Also got complimented by the guys at the movies... Took Athena to see The Happening yesterday. I snuck an eleven year old into a rated R movie. WHAT was I thinking? She really wanted to see it so I saw no real problem with it. The reviews said it wasnt scary (they also said it wasnt good) so I thought it would be okay. She freaked out at the previews. Poor Athena had to sit in my lap during the entire movie and would often whimper into my shoulder. Guys, I applaud you if you dont complain when your girl sits on your lap the entire movie. About fifteen minutes in I couldnt feel my legs, much less pay attention to the movie. I found it hilarious, btw. Also went to the movies today. Got to see an advanced screening of The Love Guru. Took Athena to that. I didnt want to go, but it was free and better than sitting around in the house. Plus my dream would be to become a movie reviewer (right after princess or superhero), so that would mean going to movies I didnt want to watch. I had really low expectations (I would much rather Get Smart do well in the box office this weekend as I aDORE Steve Carrell) and it turned out to be quite funny! Offensive and vulgar, but kept the laughs going. For example, here are some quotes I remember:
"Do you want some Quebec Pizza?"
"Whats that?"
"Pop tart and ketchup."

"Dont look at me with that tone of voice or I swear to God I will punch you in your shirt!"

"You're jumpy.... like prison bitch jumpy...

They had a bunch of great one liners. Almost all of them went over Athena's head, thank god. But anyway, her mom insisted we get there an hour early as the seats were first come first serve. Turns out we didnt need to go nearly that early at all, but oh well. So we're standing in line and I'm bored and listening in on other people's conversations. The four guys behind us are just chit chatting and the old lady in front was talking about bodily issues. Oooookay. So we get in and sit down and the four guys in line behind us end up sitting in front of me and Athena. I've got nothing better to do so I try to start up a meaningful conversation with Athena. Do you know how hard it is to talk politics with a kid? Not informed at all. Haha. So there are maybe like 20 people in the theatre at this point with about 50 mins left before the picture. Three of the four guys get up for some odd reason and leave for a bit. I get bored and say to Athena "You know what we should do? Make friends." Immediately the guy in front of me turns around and says "I'll be your friend!" We talk for a good while before his friends come back and then continue the conversation with all. Brad and Andrew (Andrew was the guy I talked to first) talked to me about what to do in Grand Rapids and Married and Married (how they introduced themselves.... not sure how to take that) talked to me about movies. Married number one kept commenting on how I was perfect for this Andrew guy because I love to play poker. Low standards, huh? Haha. He also makes the comment about how he noticed me come in and told the guys to sit by me and Athena. Why do I always make friends with the creepers? But they were a fun bunch to talk to and I didnt give any real info out. Turns out Married No. 1 was born in Minnesota! We talked Ya Sure Ya Betcha for a while to bug his friends. Nice guys. A good distraction for 40+ minutes.

Have a great night!

When bored, I build large suspension bridges in my yard.

So today was Fathers' Day. Hope you all did something nice for your Pops. I sent a card, but it probably wont get there until tomorrow. Oops! Sam and I were assigned to make a cake. We had the cake mix... German Chocolate. We were up at the lake house and they dont have a lot of cooking crap there, so after we had already poured the mix into the bowl with water we realized we didnt have a vegetable oil. Oh snap. There were only two types of oil... olive and peanut. We debated and voted on Peanut Oil. Ha. BIG MISTAKE. We tasted the batter and it was HORRIBLE. Liquid nuts. Ick. So we added about a pound of cinnamon to cover our mistake. Michael came in right after that and saw the peanut oil on the counter. He said we shouldnt use it for the cake. We said we couldnt find any veg oil...did he have a suggestion? He voted for Crisco, so we told him that we would use it implying we hadnt used the peanut oil. This was going downhill fast. We made the cake and prayed to all the gods we knew of (Even the Spaghetti one). We doused it in frosting and hoped for the best. Didnt actually turn out that bad. Didnt taste like German chocolate at all, but we blamed the Crisco. Bad Crisco.... haha.
I dont like reading what everyone else is reading, but I've gotten into the Twilight series and now I cant put the second book down. Oh my god, the books make me want someone to push me up against a car and make out with me. They're that good. Action and romance... no WAY should they be under the "teen" literature section. Cant wait until the movie comes out.. 12.12.08! Go figure that the only dates I know are the days movies come out, my birthday, and the Olympics. But if it were to be anyone... So yeah. Girls, you need to read these books. Swoonworthy. Guys, you've got another fake character to live up to... Wiki Edward Cullen and Jacob Black. Le sigh. Haha.

Noches

Of Course You Know!

Dont pretend like you have a clue as to what I do on a daily basis. You have no idea what this is doing to me. I do not LIKE to have to yell at kids. I do not LIKE to hear parents scream at their children. I do not LIKE to see these girls fall apart. But I do not KNOW what else to do. I can hug them, console them, comfort them.... every day I reach a breaking point and I think I might snap. I was not raised like this. I dont think that I ever backtalked to my parents as much as Audrey does. I dont think I ever treated my brother the way Athena treats Audrey. I'm just not used to this.... so please, dont act like I'm on vacation just having a blast. You can come here and try it. See how you fare. I'm doing the best that I can. Are you?

Just Shows How Hard You Have To Fall

I think that I expect too much out of people. I mean, here are Carrie and Mike, preparing to get married in a month, and based off my experience I dont think they should. I was lucky enough to be raised with two parents who loved each other. I honestly dont think I have ever heard them raise their voices to the other. They are just perfect for each other. So when I compare my parents relationship to others around me, they just dont compare. And it sucks because I would LOVE to have what my parents have. But I dont think that it will ever happen. Never fight with someone? How do they do it? I LIKE to fight. I like to get in someone's face and duke it out. I would never do it maliciously, but you know how some people just like to argue? I'm one of those people. And I'm damn good at it, which makes it even more fun. I like to make people have to catch themselves. I guess it isnt fighting though, because that is with the intention of hurting someone... I dunno, I hope you understand what I mean.
So much stuff got fried because of the storm... the washer doesnt work, along with the television upstairs and the fridge is on the fritz. The middle part where the door comes is burning hot all the time and the technician said that they will be able to fix it within two weeks... but we should take everything out of it and unplug it. Do you know how much food needs to be cold? All the good stuff! So now I have no eggs for french toast, no cheese for lasagna, and no milk for lunch. Perfect. I'll just have to make do. That's kinda been the motto this summer.... just make do.
Took the girls out to the store so that Sam could pick up whatever she wanted to drink. It was at this point that I saw how I was going to die... Sam was going to buy a Rockstar and go on an accidental murderous rampage in which I would be on the casualty list. My entire short life flashed before my eyes... In these moments I saw what I loved most... sugar... sugar... sugar... and ponies! It was a great flashback. Haha. Took the girls to the library so that Athena could pick out some more books. She is getting into the Child Called It series and she cant put the books down. Granted, they are amazingly written, but I dont know if they are appropriate for an 11 year old. Not my call. Went to the park and took pictures. The girls just love to model! Sam is so pretty that it is easy to take nice shots of her. And they follow direction really well. Only Audrey complained that she wasnt getting as many shots as the other girls. She probably wasnt, but the girl complains too much anyway. I let it go. Went back to the house and I took out the jello I had made earlier that day and made parfaits with it. They LOVED them! Which, you know, I liked. Athena said that she thought that I was the person with the highest cool factor she knew. I told her that the cooler you are just tells people how hard you will have to fall. I dont think she got it, but I didnt know how else to explain it. She'll understand someday. Watched Farmer Wants a Wife. The girls actually cheered when Brooke got picked for the date. They want her to win so badly because they think that she is the most like me. Ooookay. I guess we have a lot of the same characteristics and beliefs... but she is pretty much a model. Not that I have any problem being me. My confidence here has certainly gone up! Haha. Hard to believe that I have only been here for three weeks... I cannot wait to live with Steph and Querida and Mystery Roomie next semester. If I can make it through this with my patience intact, I can make it through anything!!! Hoping to find an animal shelter to take the girls to tomorrow. Wish me luck!

Have a great night!

Easily Manipulated

The power is back on! Yay Power Guys! I'm so glad it's back. Ugh. Torturous.
Today was... eventful. I took the girls to the mall. Audrey was hard to watch as every two minutes she would wander off or ask when we were going to Libby Lu. Goddamn you, Libby Lu... Anyway. We stopped at a bunch of stores for Sam and Athena (Aero, A&F, Deb, etc) as well as Barnes & Noble for me. I finally picked up the sequel to Twilight. Movie comes out in December... 12.12.08, actually. Easy enough to remember. So halfway through (we havent been to Libby Lu or Limited Too yet) we decide to grab a bite to eat. I go to A&W while the girls go to Taco Bell. I chat it up with the attendant guy and he convinces me to get a milkshake. I wanted to get cheese curds, but he was so sure that I would like the milkshake. I end up going to the counter three more times for random things for the other girls. The last time I am over there, Athena actually has the gumption to come over and whispers "Get his number!" as he was very cute and charming. I told her that it isnt how that works and she walks over to talk to him. I oh so casually throw something shiny on the floor to distract her, grab the french fries for Sam, and bolt out of there. The next ten minutes consist of Sam and Athena looking over at the A&W giggling "He's looking at you and smiling! He's talking to his friends and smiling! Go get his number!" Poor, poor girls. They will be sorely disappointed later in life. They dont know that you have to gauge the situation, and I dont care how many times he looked at me and "smiled"... the guy HAD to have been taken. So all of a sudden I see the one person I never wanted to see again and try to hide my face with my delicious milkshake. Sam notices and goes "Oh shit..." and tells the girls to quiet down. It's the guy from the AllTel booth. I was looking at the phones and ended up with him giving me his number. In case I wanted to know prices. So that was on Saturday. I figured he wouldnt recognize me. But it wouldnt be interesting if that happened, so of course he recognizes me. He walks around the food court looking at my inconspicuous table the entire time. We leave 5 minutes later and wouldnt you know it, he follows us. I hurry the girls to the ladies room and he veers off. So now I cant go to Macy's or Old Navy anymore b/c the booth is RIGHT THERE.... dang it! This crap never happens in Duluth. I dont know if I am just more confident, dont care what others think more here so I let my "real personality" show, or if the ladies of Michigan must be dogs because I aint no ten. We go to Deb and try on prom dresses as we are required to do and then I buy tokens for the girls to go on the carousel. The thing is right in the middle of the mall and it is huge! Me being me, I decide that I want to ride on the ... Okay, so Tom is calling for the fourth time in two hours... on a weeknight... when he knows I have the girls... I'm not answering... Arrugh. Again, none of this in D-Town... what does that mean? Carousel... I ride it. Pick the biggest, ugliest horse there is because I figure he doesnt have a passenger often. Poor horsey... We go to Libby Lu and Athena spends all her money on some glitter stuff. These guys must make a killing! The parents shell out fifty bucks for their spawn to dress up like Hannah Montana and get stickers put on their faces.... GREAT idea.
We go back home and after dinner I take the girls to play tennis. I'm no pro, but I'm not that bad either. Audrey cant hit the ball to save her life so after about 15 mins of playing doubles she sits out to read a book. I try to give Athena and Sam tips and Athena starts really improving. So yay for that! Athena asks me how blind people play tennis. I say that I dont think they really can. She asks if they can play golf. I said maybe. She says that they must be really good at Marco Polo. I stifle a giggle. These girls just pop out quotes left and right. Haha.
I rollerblade (Athena uses the scooter and Sam and Audrey use bikes) over to the park not realizing how steep the hill really is. I see a bridge and hope to God that I can grab the railing to stop. Ha. Hahhahahaha. Oh, silly dreams... I totally biff it and now I'm bruised up and cant move too much without my right shoulder shooting up in pain. But thats not what I'm sad about. I've had these bracelets for a year and they mean a lot to me. They're made from special grass from Africa and they were wicked expensive. Two of them break beyond repair during impact. How, I am not sure. But they do. So now I feel naked without them. Not awesome.
The girls play at the playground for a while until about 9pm. I then take them to the ice cream shoppe, which thinking back on it probably wasnt a good idea, but whatever. So we get there and I buy them sundaes and we sit down and just enjoy each others company for a while. This older lady with two... couldnt have been older than six year olds... starts talking to me and makes the comment "Your children are beautiful." I think I choked on my ice cream because I stuttered out that they werent mine. The lady breathes a sigh of relief and says "Oh thank goodness, because you would have been oh so young." I would have been nine! NINE! I make the joke to myself that I'm looking pretty good for poppin three kids out before I'm 21 and the lady just laughs. Ha. Sure, lady. I'm not even sure that I want kids. I like them, dont get me wrong. But having my own... I dunno.

Have a great night!

NOES!!!!!

There.... is no electricity.... at the house. That means no cooking, no water, no television... no SHOWER... oh God... I NEED to take a shower every morning or I dont wake up... I must have done something horrible to deserve this.... I'm tweakin out... the weather is horrible so the kids have to stay inside... I took them to the library half a block away and they have electricity here. Our neighbor's power has been off since Friday. No shower since Friday... that would be HORRIBLE! I'm comin to the breaking point.... save me.

I'm Hungry, I'm Dirty, I'm Losing My Mind.... EVERYTHING'S FINE!!!!!

If they could put one thing on my tombstone, it would be Complications.... that word pretty much defines my life. Decided to take Sam to the mall on my day off.... day off. Ha! Good one! So we go shopping with money burning in my pocket. Guess what I get... lunch. Oh, and movie tickets for me and Sam. It was so depressing that we went to see Baby Mama. I'm pretty sure that at one point in my life I claimed that I would rather shoot myself in the foot than go to that movie. Okay, so I might have a limp the rest of my life.

We did what all girls do when going to the mall - we tried on prom dresses at Deb and took pictures of them. SO much fun! I can honestly say that we had a really fun time. I enjoy Sam's company a lot. She's a good kid. She took me to the scary places (Abercrombie & Fitch... Hollister....) and I took her to Hot Topic and Spencers. Oooh, frightening! Again, didnt get anything. Guess I am pickier than I thought.

Shut up, it was a joke.
So we go back to the car so we can end our fun outing. Car wont start. I try it again. A few times. Then it starts to rain. I call my dad and he listens to the grinding noises the poor thing makes. He says it (most likely) isnt my fault. Okay... so now what? The family is over an hour away at the lake house, I've got Sam in my car, I dont know anyone here.... Taxi? Oh no. I do something worse. I have Sam call her mom. Footnote: Mike told me that under no circumstances should I ever talk to Sam's mom. I guess she is Satan in human form or something. I dont know what else to do. Sam's mom comes and picks us up, leaving the P.O.S. in the parking lot. We go back to Sam's house for a little bit. Turns out Sam's mom is totally nice. Whether it is all an act (like Carrie said it would be) or not, I have no idea. But she really did me a favor. She even drove me out of her way back to the house. So she's okay in my book.
Duck deserves to die. I take him out for a bit so he can get some fresh air and he leaps from my hands and hauls ass behind the entertainment center. This thing is huge. No way that I can move it. I try in vain for twenty minutes to get the bird to come out. Finally I decide that he wrote his own death warrant and I am going to take a shower. I go back to my room after my shower to get dressed and go back to the bathroom to put my contacts in. Guinness (the cat) is sitting on the toilet... I apologize for disturbing him, but he looks suspicious. I shoo him out and find that damn duck hiding behind the toilet. Now he's back in his "cage" while I try to keep the cat away from him. I hate him.
It's raining pretty badly. Hope everyone remains safe inside!

Have a great night!

RAIN!!!!

It's raining out!!!!!
Yay!
There's a rainbow... sunny yet still thundering. Athena is just loving it. It's keeping her from doing her chores... a bit of a bad thing, but whatever. Supposedly there are tornadoes, but I dont see anything to indicate the likeliness of it. We will probably still be alive tomorrow! Thats good, right?

Sam is sleeping over tonight. She is supposed to be at her mom's this weekend, but she called me and is lonely. Of course I'll let her stay over. We're gonna go to the mall tomorrow and maybe the movies. Hope it turns out to be fun!
So much for a weekend off...

So then the electricity went out....

You know how much fun it is to eat a tortilla that is only half cooked? Not much. It rained a bunch here with supposed 60mph winds, though I saw no effects from it. I tried to make a tortilla in the microwave when the electricity went out. Sad panda. Decided to go for cereal instead. Instant winner.
Athena had her last day of school today. She was ecstatic when she came in the door. Turns out she doesnt have to take summer school (a big worry for her and her mom), she got an invitation to go to the movies with a friend, AND the boy she likes asked her out along with four or so other little chitlins. The girl is in the seventh grade now... dont boys still have cooties? I took her to the ice cream shop to celebrate. My girl was bouncing off the walls! I was so happy for her. She needs to have good stuff like this to happen to negate all the crap she has to go through some days. Instead of going to the movies (her mom didnt want to give her eight bucks to go to the movies with a friend... but she spent $100+ on a haircut yesterday....) she went to Taylor's house to sleepover. Essentially I had half a day off today and half a day off tomorrow. HORRAY! I can finish Season 2 of Weeds now. Muahahahaha.

Have a great day!!

Finally... Some Plans!

Thank God I finally have some plans here! I have this weekend off so Tom is going to show me around Hudsonville. I was surprised that he called me this early.... I just talked to him yesterday, and he calls me at 11pm... whatever. I guess we're going to dinner and going clubbing. As long as it is nothing like Stargate. Yuck. It'll just be really nice to get out of the house and with someone that isnt a fan of Hannah Montana (unless he is, in which case I'm skipping it all and just going to the mall.) I think he said something about taking me to the other mall. There are two here, and they're both pretty good I guess. Woodland, I think it is called. I am in love with RiverTown though. They've got everything that I need. I will probably go there and to Michael's this weekend. Need some art supplies. I'm going on a painting kick again!!! Whoot! Also need to buy some art supplies for the kiddies for rainy days. It is supposed to be icky for the rest of the week. I hope not... I really want to go rollerblading again tomorrow. Athena wants to go on her scooter or skateboard instead. As long as I dont have to go on a skateboard, I'm fine with it. No way will I ever be able to use one of those!

Have a great night.

The World Doesnt Have Walls

Athena decided that the next time we are up at the lake house we should do a ding dong ditch. I told her I'm not much of a runner, so I'll ditch her and she can ring the doorbell and get caught. She seemed up for the idea.
Tomorrow is Athena's last day of school and she gets back at 12.50, so I'll have to wake up before then. Oh darn. We spent most of the day playing games and deciding what movies to watch. We both love Disney movies (I'm a huge sucker for a prince) so she decided to make a list of movies that I have to buy on DVD. Her list consists of:
Anastasia (Not really Disney, but one of my favorites)
Hercules
The Little Mermaid
Aladdin
Beauty and the Beast
Bambi (I'm not gettin this one. I HATE this movie SO much!!!)
So yeah, we'll see how that goes.

Went rollerblading before bed. I love rollerblading, even if it is with two 11 year olds (we picked up Taylor at her house). I'm actually really good at it. My childhood dream was to live at Skate City and just skate backward for hours. Just like with skiing, I always want to be the fastest. But I discovered an important difference between skating outside and skating in Skate City - the world doesnt have walls... and I dont know how to stop. Many, many hills in Hudsonville. We skated to the park where we proceeded to twirl on a tire swing until we both were ready to throw up. Good times. There were three guys playing softball at the field next to the park, and Taylor and Athena kept pushing me to go and talk to them. The opening line would be "Hey boys, who is winning?" Haha. They're so cute... their goal for the summer is to find me the perfect guy. Thanks girls... Just to humor them I went over and talked to the guys. Just chatted. I went back and the girls were glowing. Athena was gushing over how the guy without a shirt was "checking me out". I'm not sure she even knows what that means. Today I taught her "copping a feel" when she described to me what this one kid was trying to do in her class. I think we are equally bad influences on each other. ; )

Have a great day!!!

So I'm Bleeding... Profusely....

Today rocked. It rained and was icky and I found out that if you put a tortilla in the microwave for too long, it explodes.
Carrie and a friend were going to go get pedicures and invited me to go with. It was called The Casino, so I figured it would be awesome. And I've never had my nails done before. So we get there and the main lady is extremely pushy. Sure, there were free beverages, but was it really worth it? I dont know...so I opt for a manicure. I dont like people touching my feet, but thats another story altogether. So my manicurist is this hot Vietnamese guy and me being me decide it would be fun to chat it up. I dont THINK it was flirting, but pretty much everyone thinks I'm a bit of a flirt. Which I'm not. I don't think. I dunno, maybe. Whatever. I learn a lot about him, as well as the guy doing nails behind me, the owner and Tom (the manicurist)'s mother. You dont care about the details of someone you will never meet's life, so I wont go into it. Long story short, he accidentally cut my pinky, my nails look cute for once, he asked me for my number, and now I'm broke. Damn my extremely large tipping tendencies. I always said you can tell a lot about a person by how much they tip. All you can tell about me from that is that I must like getting rid of all my money as fast as possible. Embarrassed myself because I wear Athena's watch... Dont have one of my own... so it is this huge pink girly monstrosity... Tom thought I was a little weird wearing it... I DONT HAVE A WATCH! Haha. So I got to bond with Carrie and her really nice friend as well as meet someone else in Hudsonville. Considering I havent had any contact with guys really for like 3 weeks, this was really nice. (Oh, PS.. If my Dad is reading this, Tom does stocks. Yeah. Thought you would like that. Haha)

Have a great night, All!

Dont Quite Know

Okay, so has anyone ever been to the Build A Bear workshop? They've got one in the mall, and I'm too freaked out to even look at it. They have these four foot mechanical bears moving like possessed demon toys and it keeps me from walking on the right side of the mall. It's right next to the Disney store and Lids... I want a baseball cap, but not THAT badly... I want Travis' hat. Loved that hat. Hopefully will get to wear it a lot more. But anyway.
Driving was mainly what I did today. They have the weirdest signs and directions. I love the "Bridge May Be Slippery" sign... in the middle of summer. Thanks, guys! I'll be sure to be extra careful. Went to a Meiers (the castoff stepsibling of WalMart) and picked up a bunch of food. Now I shall feast!!!! Bought and tried Coconut Water for the first time. They had it in Spain, but I always got something else. It's not bad, but I could only have a little bit of it at a time. Then went to the mall. Slinked past Build A Bear and got lunch at the A&W. Waaay too much for a burger. I kinda went for the root beer. Big root beer fan. You work at a bar long enough, root beer is a staple, ya know? Got new headphones since the girls broke my last pair. Whatever. They dont need to last too long, so I got a crappy pair. Athena likes them better because they are "prettier". Ooookay. Also purchased something I have needed since school ended - A Belt!!! I left my favorite one in the apartment so I got one for übercheap at Aéropostale. Finally. So now I've been wearing a sweet belt and dont have to hike my pants up every ten minutes because I never eat anymore. Dang this family and their crappy eating habits. Oooh. Right now, I am going to snack on Frosted Mini Wheats that I bought because there IS NO FOOD HERE.
Venting over.
Or is it?
Nah, it really is.
Okay.
Watched Farmer Wants a Wife with the girls today. Sam and Athena are obsessed, and I guess I am a little bit because I wiki the show to see who gets kicked off before we watch it. Didnt get to see The Mole today. A little disappointed. I LOVED that show years ago. But hockey is on, and Michigan is up for the Stanley Cup, so that is all the tv will be turned to. Whatever. I like hockey. Just kinda wanted to watch my show.
Took the girls to the elementary school to play on the playground. They spun me on a tire swing until I begged to get off. This coming from the girl who prides herself on being able to last hours on the Tilt-A-Whirl without a stop. Man, I am off on my game! Speaking of games, also took the girls to a baseball game. Just local, but it was great to see people outside of the house. Talked to this guy for like 20 mins. He said that I should print out business cards and hand them out to people where he lives because everyone over there is rich and looking for a nanny. He even offered me a job to watch his 14 and 11 year olds. Nice guy. Athena watched the entire game looking for guys for me. That girl is adamantly working to get me a boyfriend for the summer. Every five minutes it was "That guy looks like he is your age! Go ask him out!""That guy looks like Zac Efron! Go ask him out!"(which he actually kinda did!) "That guy is great with kids. Go ask him out!""That guy has the same camera as you! Go ask him out!" I'm not sure she even knows how old I am, and considering I look like I am twelve, I'm surprised the guys she is looking for for me dont have braces. Haha. She's a sweetheart. And she is trying. Whatever. I'll humor her.
Sam's mom didnt pick her up this weekend. She tries not to show it, but she was really on edge today and I think that is why. Mike called his ex and told her that he fought her in court to get full custody, and since he doesnt have it she needs to step it up and be with her daughter. I guess she doesnt pick Samuela up often and comes up with excuses. I cant imagine how hard that would be. So Sam's mom called her today and was on the phone just long enough to tell Sam to get off the bus at her house tomorrow. Guess it will just be me and Athena this week. No worries with that. We'll have fun. I gave Sam a hug and told her that I would really miss her this week, which I will. She gave me a sad smile and went to bed (I brought them back after the game past their bedtime...oops!) I just dont know what to do. I adore these girls and hate to see them hurting.
Got some new songs....Sam and Athena wrote down songs they wanted because they got sick of listening to soundtracks. They wanted to hear Boys Like Girls, Rihanna and Metro Station. I threw in a bit of Danity Kane, Chris Brown and Daughtry to make it a full playlist. Sam loves to sing in the car. Athena decided to scream like she was dying while I was driving them back today. I'm jumpy, and I almost swerved. I calmly told her that if she didnt want us to get into an accident to never scream bloody murder ever again. She said there was a bee. Uh oh. A big bee! Oh noes! So yeah. Still alive. Haha
Have to drive Sam in tomorrow super early. Have a great day!!!!

xoxo

I'm having a conversation with Eli and Ham right now, so sorry if I am a little preoccupied.

This weekend was both fun and trying. I think after this is all over I might have to change my name because it gets whined too much. Haha.
Again, I am burnt. I'm pretty sure that gallons of sunscreen arent enough anymore. Not fun. But biking for hours and swimming were pretty awesome. Yesterday I took the girls for a bike ride and we stopped at Sam's Grandma's house on the beach. The girls were warm, so we just stuck our toes in the water... and then I may have pushed someone in... and before I knew it we were all soaked. no swimsuits.... silly me. It was so much fun though. We brought a lightweight raft out and tried rocking each other off for about an hour. Really bonded with Sam and Athena. Audrey just built sandcastles.
That night the girls (who have to share a queen bed) argued for about 20 mins in bed before I said that if I heard anything the perpetrator would have to sleep on the floor for the remainder of the night. I actually said "first and only warning". I felt like my Mom. Not saying that is a bad thing, but... I dunno. It was just weird. I didnt yell at them at all, and Athena still wanted a hug before she went to sleep. She is my little cuddlebug. I adore Sam and Athena, but Audrey is going to be a hard one.
We went fishing that night. Thought it would be fun off the dock. I love to go fishing. Have great memories fishing with my dad. He would always make me kiss the fish before we threw it back. So anyway, we're getting ready to fish off the dock/boat, and I thought we had lures. Turns out they use real worms. I, for the life of me, canNOT get a worm on a hook. Always had Daddy do it. I dont like... killing things. So anyway, the girls and I had a great time trying to get me to stab a worm for my own enjoyment. I caught one fish and Athena caught one. I had to hold them both times, which I had no problem doing. I like fish. But both times we had a hard time getting the hooks out. Not fun. The poor fish bled all over me. Poor babies... so anyway, Sam catches this monster fish with blood-red eyes...we couldnt get the hook out. Sam yanks the hook for like 5 minutes and just when I think the fish is going to snap in half, it jumps. I scream and let go. The thing was HUGE. It lands on the seat and falls (without the hook) into this little crack in the boat... cant get the thing out. I'm not gonna grab it with my hands... its got prickles. The girls are screaming, I'm screaming, and the parents are gone. Athena grabs a bucket of water and pours it over the fish to "keep it alive". I know the poor thing isnt going to make it. We end up leaving it in there and pick up up the next day. I threw it into the lake and it sank... poor fish. Baaaaad experience. Haha.
Anyway, it is 11.16pm and I have to drive Sam to the bus stop tomorrow at 6.45am... time to pretend to sleep.